A Recipe for Suburban Brownies
1 gallon of gasoline
1 working automobile
1 licensed, literate driver
1 appliance-stocked kitchen
1 mixing bowl and 1 8x13" pan
About $5 US
1 grocery store
Connecting roadways (to taste)
Combine gasoline, automobile, and licensed driver. Carefully add to connecting roadways, until driver has brought the automobile to the grocery store.
Remove the driver from the automobile. Place in store with $5 for approximately 15 minutes, until both yield a box of Pillsburry Brownie mix and any needed supplementary items (such as milk or eggs).
Return driver and brownie mix (and any supplementary items) to automobile. Again add to connecting roadways, until driver has arrived at the appliance-stocked kitchen.
Preheat oven according to mix directions. Combine brownie mix, supplementary items, and any needed water in mixing bowl according to mix directions. When mix has reached desired blend, spoon into prepared 8x13" pan.
Bake according to mix directions, but be sure to enjoy a diversion during baking, and to snitch a bit slightly before they're actually cool enough to cut and eat.
Serves slightly less than mix labeling indicates.